A Missionary Must Go

Written June 7, 2007

To (sort of ) quote John Piper, a missionary must go, but not that kind of must. Missionaries don't ask for money because they'll go, if they have enough. They ask because they are going. It's a desire that can't be quenched even in the face of often overwhelming personal needs that either will or will not be met.

This desire was lacking when I first thought that the Lord wanted me to go to Russia. I was willing to go out of duty, but not desire. Oh, I wanted to go in theory, but in reality there seem to be too many obstacles or things I couldn't go without. My first taste of such desire was when I wanted to come to work at Phoenix Christian. Even though there were many "what if's", I couldn't help but pursue it . And while money certainly seemed to be an issue, I knew that money couldn't be the reason that I didn't take the job. I knew that if I was offered the job, I had to (must, but no that kind of must) take it and that by God's grace the rest would work out. And it has. The Lord has provided abundately.

I used to think that buying a house and taking the kind of job that I could see myself doing for years to come was in some ways a giant step in the opposite direction of Moscow, but I know now that the lessons I've learned and the trust I've gained in the Lord will be invaluable whenever that unquenchable desire takes hold of me.